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WWF TNT- April 30, 1986
by Scrooge McSuck
- Hosted by Vince McMahon, with co-host Lord Alfred Hayes. This week, Vince will be joined by a list of guests that includes "Luscious" Johnny Valiant, Bobby "The Brain" Heenan, Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat, Jimmy Hart and the Hart Foundation, Mr. Fuji and The Magnificent Muraco. WILL WE GET OUR SNEAK PEAK AT FUJI VICE?!
Guest #1: "Luscious" Johnny Valiant
Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentin are conspicuous by their absence. McMahon asks if the lack of positive response bothers Valiant. He says no, the people are sick, and he's used to it. He says he's disgruntled and bewildered by what happened to his Dream Team on April 7th in Chicago. He calls it an abomination of justice. There was so much chaos there was barely room for him to stand at ringside.
- We get the same highlight package of the British Bulldogs vs. Valentine and Beefcake from WrestleMania 2 that we saw on the April 19th episode of Championship Wrestling. I'll say it again, I love that the finish is a call back to the finish of their match a month earlier on Saturday Night's Main Event, but with fortunes reversed.
Back in the studio, Valiant says it's supposed to rain in Miami. Beefcake and Valentine storm the set to make excuses about prejudiced referees. Valentine says they're still the Champions in his eyes. Just like the Airlines messed around, causing them to be late here today, they were messed with in Chicago. They'll chase down the British Bulldogs and they better sure to read the fine print on the contracts. Valiant screams that they will get their rematch. They are more dangerous now more than ever because they're obsessed and upset. McMahon brings up a moment where Valentine had Davey Boy pinned and pulled him up, calling it the most stupid thing he's done in his entire career. Beefcake blames a referee for hooking his leg in the ropes, preventing him from breaking up the pin-fall. Valiant calls Dynamite Kid a "sick man", which might be the most under-rated shoot comment that wasn't meant to be a shoot comment.
Guest #2: Bobby "The Brain" Heenan
Heenan says he has a surprise for McMahon, and how much he loves the ladies. 1986 will be the year of the Heenan Family. He has a new lady protégé that he has personally trained, wined and dined. Have you ever seen Marilyn Monroe, Suzanne Summers? This is a gorgeous dish. Her name is Liberty Thomas
and they'll go to the top, guaranteeing a "World Championship" for her, and maybe a talk show, a line of lingerie and perfume. Out comes Miss Liberty Thomas, dressed in red full-body spandex. She disputes Heenan's claims of wining and dining her. This segment is DEATH. I never thought I'd say that about anything with Bobby Heenan. Liberty says when he wines and dines her a little more, maybe they can work something out. Excuse me, I have some garbage to dispose of while there's a drum barrel fire. Alfred calls this an embarrassment for Heenan, I call it an embarrassment for good entertainment.
Guest(s) #3: The Magnificent Muraco and Mr. Fuji
YES! YES! YES! FUJI VICE... Maybe. McMahon points out Muraco isn't wearing stocks. It's the style at the time in Hollywood and Miami. If it's "happening", why isn't it happening with Mr. Fuji? Muraco's reputation in Hollywood is a little something to be desired and calls Fuji Bandito the worst piece of television. Vince brings up Fuji Vice, with Michael Mann behind the idea. We get a little taste of Fuji Vice, mostly a montage of them working the streets and delivering lines poorly. Muraco says it's a work-in-progress and they're working on the problems. McMahon asks how about working on their acting ability. Muraco dismisses the criticism, noting they need a little more time and that's why we only got a little teaser. McMahon wants to see the opening of Fuji Vice that they promised, but that'll have to wait. Muraco says Fuji is "very sensual" in this and asks for a close-up of his puckered lips. OH MY GOD. Vince asks if Muraco is concerned to be sued by the creators of Miami Vice. We get to see the opening of Fuji Vice after all, and that's it, I'm done. McMahon calls it absurd, obviously holding back laughter. Muraco says McMahon is bathing in musk oil and he's supposed to know what talent is. We will have the conclusion of Fuji Vice... NEXT WEEK. BOO!
Guest #4: Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat
I don't recall seeing much of Steamboat on TNT, so we'll see if he gets respect when it comes to time, or if he's ushered out immediately. McMahon says Steamboat is the nicest gentleman to meet outside the ring. They're still talking about Fuji Vice and the crowd enjoying it for a laugh. This coming Saturday Night, Steamboat will face Jake "the Snake" Roberts. McMahon describes Roberts as "unusual", a word he uses for almost EVERYONE. Steamboat says he's heard Roberts has wanted the Dragon, and he's going to give him that chance.
Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat vs. Al Navarro:
Recycled from the yet-to-broadcast May 3rd episode of Championship Wrestling. Lockup into the corner and Navarro unloads with rights. Steamboat fires back with chops and slams his face into the turnbuckle. Steamboat grabs a side headlock. He slides between the legs of Navarro and takes him over with an arm drag before going back to the headlock. Navarro forces a break in the corner, driving a shoulder into the midsection. Whip across the ring, Steamboat hops over the charging Navarro and grabs another side headlock. Snap mare and rolling neck snap from the Dragon. Navarro escapes a headlock with a slam. Steamboat fights back from his knees, plants Navarro with a slam of his own, and finishes with a flying body press at 2:58.
Back in the studio, McMahon wonders if we'll see that flying press again, or if Steamboat will be another victim to the python. Steamboat says Roberts likes to slither around the ring, and the Dragon likes to fly, so it'll be an interesting confrontation. Roberts has put away everyone he's stepped in the ring with so far. Whoever walks away victorious, it'll help their standing in the rankings. This isn't Pro Wrestling Illustrated, Ricky!
Guest(s) #5: Jimmy Hart, Bret "The Hitman" Hart, and Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart
McMahon mentions their participation in the WrestleMania 2 Battle Royal and how close they came to victory. Bret says they won as far as they're concerned. Neidhart says the media has lied about the Refrigerator running all over them. IT'S FAKE NEWS! The truth was that the big-bellied Refrigerator was thrown out by John Studd and that's the truth. Jimmy Hart says Andre was huffing and puffing for air, and the referee pleaded with them to give Andre a minute to rest.
The Hart Foundation (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. S.D. Jones & Mario Mancini:
Recycled from the April 12th episode of Championship Wrestling. Hart and Jones lockup, with Jones wiping his hands, insinuating the obvious. Jones grabs a side headlock and comes off the ropes with a shoulder tackle. Crisscross, Jones escapes a slam and rolls Hart up for two. Jones with an arm drag into the arm bar. Mancini comes in to pick things up, but Bret rakes the eyes and throws him into a boot from the Anvil. Neidhart drops Mancini throat-first across the top rope. Hart comes off the top with an elbow with Mancini resting across the knee of Neidhart. Neidhart shows off with a dropkick. Hart Attack finishes at 3:02.
Back in the studio, McMahon asks Bret if it bothers him when people call him "greaseball." Bret says he keeps the long hair because the young girls find him attractive and call his room all night long. The body helps, as well as his wrestling ability. McMahon offers them good luck in their quest for the Tag Team Championship and hopes Jimmy doesn't hinder their chances.
Next Week: Bruno Sammartino! The Killer Bees! THE CONCLUSION OF FUJI VICE! Bobby Heenan storms the set ranting about "the beast in a fur coat" and goes off on a rant about her being a dog that he took out to dinner where they would only be accepted in the back door. "There's not enough penicillin to make me go out with her!" Well, that sure came out of nowhere.
Final Thoughts: With a strong opening segment with Johnny Valiant and HIS Dream Team, and another outstanding appearance from Muraco and Fuji promoting Fuji Vice, this is an episode I can safely recommend giving a look, even if Bobby Heenan's first appearance with "Liberty Thomas" was one of the worst segments I've ever seen from the Brain.
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