WWE Main Event - September 11, 2013
by Scrooge McSuck
- Last week on Main Event, Fandango won a pointless match against Justin Gabriel, R-Truth pointlessly won a pointless match with Damian Sandow, and the Wyatt Family remained undefeated with a somewhat easy trouncing of the Primetime Players Honestly, how hard can it be to top that show?
- Originally taped on September 10th, 2013 from... they don't say, but I'm pretty sure they're still in Toronto or a neighboring city in Ontario. Josh Mathews and the Miz are on commentary unless otherwise noted. I hate to say it, but I'm glad to see Miz back. Alex Riley was OK, but too green for regularly appearances on nationally broadcasted television.
Kofi Kingston vs. Antonio Cesaro (w/ Zeb Colter):
Hmm.... haven't seen these two wrestle on Main Event in the last month or so. Not that I'm complaining, it's bound to be at least a 3-star affair. Cesaro is coming off a loss to the returning Santino Marella, and Kofi Kingston has two victories over IC Champion Curtis Axel, so Kofi definitely has the odds in his favor here. Cesaro greets Kofi with a dropkick at the bell. Cesaro with a shoulder tackle, then grabs a side headlock. Whip to the ropes, and a Criss-Cross ends with Kofi connecting with a diving elbow. Cesaro with a leverage throw to send Kofi into the corner. Cesaro unloads with rights and lefts. Whip across the ring, Cesaro misses a charge and takes a boot to the face. Kofi with a springboard clothesline for two. Cesaro muscles Kofi to the apron to break a front facelock, then brings him back in with a back drop. Kofi with several blows to the midsection, but Cesaro shrugs it off, rams him to the buckle, and stomps him back down. Whip to the corner, and Kofi comes back with a spinning head scissors. Kofi follows Cesaro to the floor with a baseball slide. Cesaro reverses a whip to the steps, but Kofi avoids them, and comes off the steps with a somersault. Back in the ring, Cesaro regains control with not one, but two of his signature gutwrench suplexes. Kofi takes control in a slugfest, but misses a dive to the corner and spills to the floor.We return from commercial, with Cesaro working on a rear chinlock. Kofi comes close to breaking free, but Cesaro brings him down hard with it. Cesaro throws Kofi to the corner, but meets an elbow following in. Kingston with chops and a dropkick. He comes off the ropes with his weird jumping forearm, and follows that with the Boom Drop. Kofi signals for Trouble in Paradise, but Cesaro ducks under. They trade waistlocks until Kofi rolls him up for two. He comes off the top rope with a body press for another two count. Kofi goes for a hurricanrana, but Cesaro blocks, throws him in the air, and nails him with the Uppercut for a two count of his own. Another cover, another two count. Kofi plays dead, annoying Cesaro. Surprise small package... DOESN'T WORK. Cute to try and pull a Santino from Raw, but Cesaro blocks it and powers him up for a suplex. Kofi counters that with the SOS, but it only gets two! Cesaro greets Kingston with a boot. Kofi tries Trouble in Paradise again, but Cesaro grabs the legs and it's GIANT FUCKING SWING TIME! 35-seconds long, and gets a standing ovation. POPS FOR THE GIANT SWING IN 2013! CESARO IS AWESOME. He comes off the ropes with a vicious clothesline, but it only gets two! Cesaro sets for the Neutralizer, but Kofi sweeps the legs and rolls over for two. Cesaro bridges up and goes for a back slide, but Kofi blocks and hits Trouble in Paradise for the three count at 11:28 (minus one commercial break). ***1/2 Fantastic finish with some cool counter sequences. Kofi tapping into what happened on Raw, only for it to backfire, was a cool spot, and they progressed nicely from the feeling out wrestling to the balls to the walls finish. I rated it that low, however, for being a meaningless TV match and it needed a bit more time to get there, but if you want to call it 4-stars, I'm not arguing.
- We recap the CM Punk/Paul Heyman saga, which "concludes" at Night of Champions, when CM Punk takes on Curtis Axel and Paul Heyman in a Non-Title, Handicap Elimination Match. the only question is not who's going to win, but who's going to save Heyman from destruction. Will WWE bring in a former ECW name or some developmental talent to work as Punk's next foil?
The Primetime Players vs. 3MB:
(Darren Young & Titus O'Neil vs. Heath Slater & Jinder Mahal)No Mcintyre in the corner of 3MB... nursing an injury, perhaps? Tons of Funk minus the Funkadactyls join Miz and Mathews for commentary. There's going to be a Tag Team Turmoil on the Pre-Show to determine who faces the Shield on the PPV for the Tag Titles, with all three of these teams, along with the Usos and the Real Americans. I love me some Tag Team Turmoil! Mahal and O'Neil start. Mahal grabs a headlock, but O'Neil casually throws him off. Slater tags in, acting like a jackass. He has just as much luck as Mahal did. O'Neil grabs his whistle and blows in sync with the mud hole stomping he does on Mahal. There's a good idea for a baby-face spot. Young with a double axehandle from the top rope. He gets taken into the 3MB corner and double teamed almost immediately. Young with a discuss forearm and axehandle smash on Slater for two. Young takes Slater to the canvas and goes to work on the elbow. Young with a slam, and O'Neil drops him across Slater with a front suplex. 3MB get sent to the floor for a breather as we take a break.
We come back from commercial with Mahal still taking a beating. Young tags in, and finally gets to play the face-in-peril. 3MB keeps him in their corner with frequent tags while Tons of Funk suggest to the Miz that he's kind of a jerk. Whip to the ropes is reversed, and Young takes Slater over with a belly-to-belly suplex. O'Neil gets the hot tag and plows through Mahal with a shoulder tackle and clothesline. Whip to the corner, and he follows in with an avalanche. O'Neil with the monster overhead throw, followed by a running boot for a two count. Young sends Slater to the foor, only to get pulled out and sent into the announcers table. Mahal with a roll up on O'Neil for two. O'Neil with a sit-out Powerbomb, and that's enough for the three count at 10:01 (minus the commercial break). ** Nothing outstanding, but surprisingly watchable. 3MB kept their comedy act on low for this one, and the PTP offer much more in terms of match quality as babyfaces. Also, Brodus and Tensai did a good job putting over the match at the Night of Champions Warm-Up Show.
- We recap the on-going storyline concerning Triple H running the WWE with an iron-fist, punishing those who oppose his beliefs, and making life a living hell for Daniel Bryan. Thankfully, Bryan ended Raw the one on top, hopefully shutting up some douchebag Smarks who think that a three week old angle is ruined because the babyface has been getting his ass kicked in 4-on-1 situations.
R-Truth vs. Big E. Langston:
This is the type of match R-Truth should be used for. Meaningless "last call" match putting over someone with a decent chance at a uppercard push. Choice words from the Miz: Big E. Langston is "Big". Even Mathews laughs at that one. Truth grabs a waistlock, but Langston throws Truth off with ease. R-Truth grabs a side headlock, but a shoulder tackle isn't going to do him any favors. That reminds me... what ever happened to Little Jimmy? Slow-motion criss-cross ends with an R-Truth dropkick sending Big E. to the floor. Truth follows with a plancha, practically landing on his own head in the process. Back inside, he covers for a one count. Langston catches him off the second rope with a series of back breakers. Someone's been watching their Dino Bravo matches on WWE Classics on Demand. Langston with a BIG Splash for two. That was some serious elevation. He grabs an abdominal stretch, but doesn't use the ropes. Better send him for some training with Mike Rotunda on proper Abdominal stretch tactics. Truth offers a comeback until he gets taken down with a belly-to-belly suplex. Truth greets Langston with a boot in the corner, followed by a jumping heel kick. Truth with a DDT for two. Scissors Kick misses, and Langston charges through him like water running through a paper towel. Langston with the Big Ending, and it's over at 5:20. *1/2 Decent effort to get over Langston's move set and athleticism, but Truth relies way too much on overdramatic offense that makes me shake my head.Final Thoughts: Solid show from start to finish this week. Cesaro and Kofi delivered yet another in their long series of pretty good/great matches, the Tag Team Match was satisfactory and did a great job at hard-selling the PPV and the Warm-Up show match featuring Tag Team Turmoil, and Big E. is someone to keep your eyes in in the near future. Even the recaps of the two biggest angles were well done, and almost have me wanting to order the PPV. Almost.
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