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Ring of Honor - November 18, 2015

by Samoa Rowe

Before I get to the show, I have some things to get off my chest. This is my first wrestling review in about two months. Aside from my real world obligations getting in the way of my wrestling habits, I have not been in much of a mood for wrestling in the first place. I have canceled my WWE Network subscription and am formally taking a break from WWE. I had settled on this even before this past week’s Raw when Paige bad-mouthed the deceased Reid Flair to Charlotte in the main event segment. I don’t feel like there’s any one thing that is driving me away from WWE, but more like a thousand little reasons that have been aggravating me for a long time. The bad news is I’m going to miss NXT for a while, but I think I’ll get by. I don’t know what the future holds for me and wrestling reviews, but for now, here’s an episode of Ring of Honor!

Also, happy Thanksgivin' Thumpin’ to you and your’s.

-From Kalamazoo, MI. This episode was a part of the Glory by Honor event. Our hosts are Kevin Kelly and Nigel McGuinness.

-Silas Young, who recently acquired the services of 'The Boys" is forcing them to become men. Young puts 'man-itizer" on their hands so they can do some hard physical labor. He struggles teaching them to drive stick-shift. The whole thing is mildly amusing, but they get credit for trying something different.

Silas Young (with The Boys) and the Beer City Bruiser vs. War Machine (Hanson and Rowe)

Kelly and Nigel promo at #FreeTheBoys hash tag, so they’re really running with this thing. War Machine are wearing Road Warrior type gear that reminds me a bit too much of the floundering Ascension team in WWE. Hot start for War Machine, as they out-class the rotund Bruiser and fend off an invading Young. The Boys struggle to help Bruiser back to his feet, which is a touch funnier than the opening montage. Young gets decimated by Rowe (who unfortunately employs a Super Man Punch) while The Boys risk hurting their backs lifting Bruiser onto the apron. Rowe finds himself getting isolated by quick tags and takes a beating, including a top rope splash from the obese Bruiser. They take a commercial and return in time for Hanson to gain a hot tag. The Boys foolishly interfere and get piled on the turnbuckles for their trouble. Hanson places Silas on them and they each getting a turn getting smashed on the chest. Bruiser makes the save with a belly to back suplex, but Rowe catches him in an impressive suplex. The match has broken down and Bruiser inadvertently wipes out The Boys with a somersault senton. War Machine finish Young with the Fall-out at 8:31. Not a 'good" match or anything, but it made me chuckle, so **.
Winners: War Machine

-Young and Bruiser take out their frustrations on The Boys, but they cut away to a video package highlighting the BJ Whitmer/Steve Corino feud. Corino couldn’t stand by and watch Whitmer beat up a hurt Jay Briscoe, so he punched him out. I guess that cost Corino his commentating job, as he hugs Kelly and leaves to sad music.

-Nigel McGuinness hosts Steve Corino in the ring. Corino had been warned that if he touched any wrestler again, he’d be finished, so Nigel cannot reinstate him as a commentator, but maybe he can make him an active wrestler again. Corino dampens the mood by reminds everyone that he isn’t medically able to wrestle and delivers what might be his farewell speech. I can’t imagine this is really it, as they seem to have devoted a lot of time and energy into Corino’s beef with Whitmer, but this is a company that’s earned a reputation for not always making great decisions.

-Silas Young continues training The Boys. He berates them for not knowing how to use a urinal.

-It’s 'Story Time" with Adam Cole (also known as Inside Ring of Honor). Recently, Jay Lethal tried to blocks Roderick Strong from getting another shot at his ROH title. Instead, Nigel McGuinness was able to force Lethal to put his TV title on the line instead. The match happens next week (spoiler, Roderick wins). Cole pimps Lethal vs. AJ Styles for the World title at Final Battle, which is probably the best possible main event ROH can create at this point in time.

-Silas Young emerges from a bathroom stall and hands a plunger to The Boys. They have to clean up his mess. These segments have left mildly amusing and entered the mildly annoying territory.

Michael Elgin vs. Kevin Lee Davidson

Davidson looks like a younger version of the Beer City Bruiser. Remember when ROH used to get picked on for featuring an endless parade of 160 pound skinny guys? Those days are over. Elgin wins with a lariat at 0:10. Whatever.
Winner: Michael Elgin

-Elgin hangs around to talk. He got to perform in New Japan’s G1 Climax tournament and it made him realize that he’s too good for this nonsense. Well, that’s what he’s thinking anyway, what he actually says it made him believe he should be ROH Champion.

-Recently, Matt Taven and Mike Bennett, collectively known as The Kingdom, upset The Young Bucks and The Addiction to become the Tag Team Champions.

ROH Tag Team Championship:
The Kingdom © (Matt Taven and Mike Bennett, with Maria Kanellis) vs. The Addiction (Frankie Kazarian and Christopher Daniels, with Chris Sabin)

They come to the ring with respectably produced Titantron-style entrance videos! Makes ROH look way more big-league than usual. This is a heel vs. heel match, so Nigel speculates over which team will cheat more. Naturally, respected veterans Daniels and Kazarian settle in as de facto babyfaces, and Daniels suffers some cheap blind shots early on. Kazarian does the same, but in a more 'eye for an eye" sort of way. Kazarian and Bennett have a cute moment where they each participate in a clean break before going for a cheap shot. CUE THE COMMERCIAL! Back from break and both teams are trying to be more dastardly than the other. Daniels and Bennett have a good slugfest and take it to the ring. Taven and Kazarian both tease belt shots but both fake injury Eddie Guerrero-style once the ref turns around. They ham it up, pretending to struggle to their feet and go for eye rakes. Sabin and Maria interfere at the same time and both get kicked out. They cut to a SECOND commercial. Wrestling promotions sure do expect a lot of patience from their fans these days, eh? Back from break, and the pace has quickened, with Daniels putting Bennett down with a split legged moonsault, only to get wiped out by a flying Taven. The match breaks down with all four men in the ring. Taven kicks out after taking a double neck breaker. The Kingdom set Kazarian up for a backpack chin breaker/enziguri combo, but Daniels saves the match. Daniels suffers a Codebreaker and super kick, but Kazarian saves with a leaping DDT. Bennett misses a spear and takes down the ref. Maria returns to check on her hubby, giving Daniels a chance to attack a woman. Taven makes the save and Maria kicks Daniels in the groin, followed by a super kick. Kazarian is ready to win, but a red masked guy runs in for a super kick. The Kingdom retain via shenanigans at 11:22. Really funny comedy match that tried to be too many different things at times, **¾.
Winners and still ROH Tag Team Champions: The Kingdom

-War Machine show up to pose on the stage and remind us that they’re next in line for a title shot.

Final Thoughts: Not the most inspiring episode of ROH ever, as the focus was on comedy. That’s good and all, but it means that you actually have to be funny. At least no one besmirched a dead family member. Thumbs in the Middle.

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