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Monday Night RAW July 7, 2008
by Sassy

Monday Night Raw is broadcast on the USA network from New Orleans, LA

Ringside announcers: Michael Cole & Jerry “The King” Lawler

Ring announcer: Lillian Garcia

Backstage interviews: Todd Grisham

The audience sees a replay of CM Punk’s WWE World Heavyweight Championship title victory over The Rated R Superstar Edge and Punk’s defense of his title later that night against John Bradshaw Layfield with John Cena and Cryme Tyme running interference outside the ring. Stephanie McMahon is now on camera to tell everyone that Shane asked everyone last week to pull together and she is asking everyone to do the same.

The arena is dark and when the lights come on, Friday Night Smackdown General Manager is in her wheelchair in the center of the ring, mic in hand. She has as much trouble being heard over the crowd at Raw as she does on Smackdown. She is protesting the loss of the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. She says she will not leave the ring until CM Punk surrenders the title to her and that she demands an apology. CM Punk does appear wearing the title belt – looks great on him, too – and he enters the ring. Punk grabs a mic. She accuses Punk of stealing the championship from Edge. Punk says he didn’t do anything to Edge that Edge hasn’t done to others. She blames Punk because Edge has called off the wedding. Punk says he’s sure she can find someone else to marry. Punk tells her to go after The Great Khali. She gets out of her wheelchair and slaps Punk across the face before sitting back down. Punk says she just bought herself a one-way ticket back to Smackdown but John Bradshaw Layfield’s limo appears and JBL gets out of the limo, surprise, surprise, with a mic in his hand. JBL tells Punk he just bought himself a one-way ticket to the end of his brief championship reign. JBL accuses Punk of cheating to keep the title. JBL tells Punk that today he will leave champion because he is again challenging Punk for the championship. Punk tells JBL he had his shot and he lost. John Cena appears to get himself into the mix – he’s the one that kept JBL’s personal security team out of the match between JBL and Punk last week. Cena tells JBL usually he is very pathetic but now he’s even more pathetic. Cena tells JBL they don’t play the blame game. Cena tells JBL to shut his mouth and listen to the new champion. Cena says the McMahons aren’t there and technically no one is in charge. Cena says they need to figure this out like men. Cena says there are two of them that want to face Punk for the title at The Great American Bash and they should settle it as men and it should be JBL faces John Cena for the Number One Contender spot. The Animal Batista appears at the top of the entrance ramp and heads to the ring. Batista congratulates Punk just as Cena did. Batista says he wanted to come out and say hello to his good friend Vickie Guerrero and then tells her to get lost. Batista then says that Punk could grab the title because of what Batista did and then JBL gets in front of Batista. Cena gets in the middle and says it should be John Cena vs. JBL vs. Batista in a triple threat match for the number one contender spot. JBL doesn’t like it so Cena says it will be Batista vs. Cena and JBL decides that he will be in the triple threat match. The Big Red Machine appears and heads to the ring. Kane doesn’t bring a mic to the ring, he just takes JBL’s away from him. Kane says that he wants in, too. Punk says there goes the idea of the triple threat but it looks like it’s going to be a fatal four-way. We go to commercial break.

Rey Mysterio from San Diego, CA weighing 175 lbs
Vs.
Santino Marella from Italy weighing 222 lbs.

Marella comes out shoving but Mysterio pokes Marella in the eyes. Marella has Mysterio down and he goes for the cover but he only gets a two count. Marella tries for another cover and this time he gets a one count. Mysterio doesn’t seem to have lost his fan base my moving to Raw from Smackdown. Marella ducks the 619 and drops Mysterio with a clothesline. Marella again goes for the cover and gets a two count. Mysterio jumps in the middle of Marella’s chest and then goes for the cover, getting a two count. Mysterio kicks Marella into the ropes, hits the 619 and goes up to the top to deliver a splash and go for the cover this time getting the three count. Time: 3 minutes.
Winner: Rey Mysterio with a 619 and a splash

Marella certainly made Mysterio look not only good but great in Mysterio’s first match since his return to WWE. We go to commercial break.

Todd Grisham is backstage with Punk. Grisham asks Punk who he wants to win the match tonight. Punk says that…because Snitsky shows up to tell Punk that he won the title by a fluke. Punk says he will face Snitsky in the ring tonight to show Snitsky why Punk deserves to be champion. Cena is backstage with Mickie James and Kelly Kelly shows up. James says that Kelly is the newest Raw diva. We go to commercial break.

Tag Team Match
Layla & Jillian (who are already in the ring)
Vs.
Mickie James, WWE Women’s Champion & Kelly Kelly

James should be thrilled being the best, maybe the only, women’s wrestler in the ring. Time: 4 minutes of my life I will never get back.
Winner: Mickie James & Kelly Kelly

JBL’s limo pulls up but the driver gets out and runs to the back and we go to commercial break.

JBL walks into the arena past his limo. Looks like his driver must have forgotten him. We’ve had falling lights, sound interference and John Cena comes out of the back of the limo with a crow bar. Cena says that the limo can’t pass limo laws. And Cryme Tyme appears out of the other side of the limo with baseball bat and lead pipe in hand. For JBL’s protection, the three of them “fix” JBL’s limo. Cena wishes JBL luck in the fatal four-way tonight. Best lookin’ limo I ever saw and I don’t even live in Louisiana! CM Punk appears and sees the limo. I think he likes it, too. We go to commercial break.

CM Punk from Chicago, IL
WWE World Heavyweight Champion
Vs.
Snitsky from PA weighing 307 lbs.

If Punk delivers the GTS on Snitsky, I want him to help me move furniture next week. Punk didn’t move fast enough and Snitsky has Punk down. Snitsky body slams Punk to the match and goes for the cover but Punk kicks out. Snitsky has Punk in a bear hug but Punk breaks out of the hold to get caught by an elbow as he comes off the ropes. Snitsky goes for a leg drop but Punk gets out of the way and delivers a boot to the head. Another boot to the head and Snitsky is down. Punk springboards off the top rope and takes Snitsky down to the mat. Punk delivers a high knee and a bulldog. Punk DOES deliver the GTS, goes for the cover and gets the three count and the win. Time: 3 minutes.
Winner: CM Punk with a GTS

Punk made it a one sided wrestling match but Snitsky doesn’t wrestle. It was a short match but that may have been a good thing for Punk. Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels is heading toward the arena and we go to commercial break.

The audience sees a video of the feud between Michaels and Y2J Chris Jericho. Michaels comes to the ring. Michaels has a bandage over his eye and says that Jericho challenged him to a match at The Great American Bash. Michaels says that he accepts the challenge. Jericho appears with Lance Cade in tow. The audience is chanting HBK but some poor guy in the front row is trying to chant Y2J and be heard over everyone around him. And there’s a lot of talk about how Jericho will never be like Michaels. We go to commercial break.

Charlie Haas from Dallas, TX weighing 249 lbs. (already in the ring)
Vs.
Kofi Kingston from Jamaica weighing 218 lbs.
WWE Intercontinental Champion

I realize that Kingston needs a showcase since he won the title but Haas is too good of a ring worker to be a fall guy for someone else. Haas hasn’t been on Raw for quite some time and to see him in this match is a little difficult to watch. Time: 3 minutes.
Winner: Kofi Kingston with a high kick.

I was not impressed with this match. It should have taken more time and there should have been much more interaction between the two opponents. After the match Paul Birchill appears to beat up Kingston. We go to commercial break.

Fatal Four-Way Number One Contender’s Match
The Animal Batista from Washington, DC weighing 290 lbs.
Vs.
John Bradshaw Layfield from NY
Vs.
The Big Red Machine Kane weighing 323 lbs.
Vs.
John Cena weighing 240 lbs.

The match begins and we go to commercial break. Back to the action, well, for a short time and we go to another commercial break. Back to the ring again, Kane and Batista are down, Cena delivers the FU to JBL and goes for the five-knuckle shuffle but Kane takes Cena down with a clothesline. Kane and Batista are facing off in the ring and JBL gets involved and is taken down by Batista. JBL drops Batisa with a clothesline but Cena has a submission hold on JBL but Kane now has Cena and JBL in a chokehold. Now it’s Cena and JBL outside of the ring battling it out on the floor. Cena gets sent into the steel steps and Kane and Batista battle it out in the ring. JBL has the steel steps to take out Cena with a smash to the skull. Kane is on the floor with JBL and he sends JBL over the guardrail and into the audience. Kane goes up to the top and misses the clothesline as he comes off, but Batista nails Kane with a spear, goes for the cover and gets the three count. Total match time: 7 minutes.
Winner: The Animal Batista

With the two commercial breaks in the middle of the match, I lost interest in the whole thing. Batista will face CM Punk for the WWE World Heavyweight title at The Great American Bash.

Kane is in the center of the ring and he doesn’t look happy. He rolls out of the ring and takes it out on the steel steps. Then Kane pounds on the announcer’s table. Kane then nails some guy with a kick who is standing next to the announcer’s table and throw the timekeeper over the announcer’s table. Garcia screams and runs. Kane looks at Cole and has Cole by the jacket, dragging him over the table and into the ring. Cole doesn’t run fast enough. Kane keeps asking if he is alive or is he dead but Cole doesn’t understand the question. Kane has Cole to his feet and as Kane goes for the choke slam, Lawler comes in to make the save. Kane has Lawler down and is pounding on him. Cole has rolled out of the ring and I don’t think he’ll be coming in to save Lawler. Kane delivers a boot to Lawler’s head and then leaves the arena.

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