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Prime Time Wrestling - March 26, 1991
by Scrooge McSuck
- It's not Arsenio from L.A., it's not Oprah from Chicago, it's not Letterman from New York, It's inconveniently located smack dab in the middle of the Mojave Desert, in respectable, refined, romantic Las Vegas, NV, right next door to the Nevada Nuclear test site, it's the all new WWF Prime Time Wrestling!
- We are on location at Caesar's Palace with Vince McMahon and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan, along with Lord Alfred Hayes and a host of WWF Superstars. It's the WrestleMania After Party, and Vince must've loved it enough to take a WrestleMania to Las Vegas a couple of years later. Heenan is celebrating Mr. Perfect's retaining of the Intercontinental Title, despite technically losing the match. Heenan has a point… he kept the title, it's worth celebrating.
- WrestleMania VII Update with "Mean" Gene Okerlund. "The Largest PPV Audience" witnessed the Ultimate Warrior defeating the Macho King in a "Career Ending" Match, but in the surprise of the night, Miss Elizabeth returned and reunited with Savage. The Nasty Boys defeated the Hart Foundation for the WWF Tag Team Championship, and the Immortal Hulk Hogan won his 3rd WWF Championship from Sgt. Slaughter in what we thought would be the end of the War, but as we found out, there was a post-show attack where Slaughter threw a fire-ball at Hogan's face. Gene Okerlund's choice words to describe the chaos? Hogan was RAPED by a cold-blooded ambush. That's not PG!
"Hacksaw" Jim Duggan vs. Rick Saxon:
I'm assuming this is a Prime Time exclusive squash. Despite being the Patriotic Wrestlemania, Duggan was only featured in a non-wrestling guest commentary spot on the show. I don't think Duggan had anything of significance going for him until being paired up with Sgt. Slaughter towards the end of 1991. Duggan rams his opponent to the buckle a few times before tossing him to the floor like an out-of-shape sack of potatoes. Back inside, Duggan with a twirling body slam and the 3-point stance clothesline to finish things at 2:32.
- Back at Caesar's Palace, Bobby Heenan is accompanied by two wenches, Aphrodite and ETHEL, feeding him fruit. We return from commercial break, with "Million $ Man" Ted Dibiase arriving to put over his on-going program with former bodyguard, Virgil. He's in such a good mood, he's letting Heenan hit the tables with a stack of his own chips. I guess Dibiase and Heenan go way back, to the sale of Andre's contract, right up to Dibiase helping Heenan and Perfect screw over Kerry Von Erich for the Intercontinental Title.
Big Boss Man vs. Hercules:
Joined in Progress from the January 21st card held at Madison Square Garden. Hercules is in control with a seated chinlock, or a poor man's Camel Clutch. You make the call. New commentary is provided by Mooney and Lord Alfred, since the original broadcast I remember having Mooney with Heenan until the last two matches of the night. Boss Man escapes and slams Hercules face-first to the canvas. Boss Man feeds the boot and nails Hercules with an enziguri, nearly sending Alfred into a fit. Whip to the ropes and Boss Man with a boot, followed by the Sidewalk Slam. He chooses not to cover, so I'm assuming something went wrong. Indeed it did, as Paul Roma shows up for his missed que and hits Boss Man with a sad looking missile dropkick, drawing the Disqualification at 1:37. Hercules puts Boss Man in the Torture Rack and gives him a back breaker (the Rack Attack!). To add insult to injury, Bobby Heenan enters the ring to slap Boss Man around until the LOD make the save.
- Next Tuesday, Prime Time Wrestling comes to you from the blue skies of Venice Beach, CA, with WWF Tag Team Champions, the Nasty Boys, WBF Superstar Mike Christian, and WWF Champion, Hulk Hogan.
Legion of Doom vs. Bob Bradley & Mike Casey:
The LOD are only 48 hours removed from one of the more dominant victories in the short history of WrestleMania, destroying Power & Glory just shy of one-minute. Of course, the show running long and Roma allegedly being hurt (but healthy enough to take the Doomsday Device) will do that to plans. Hawk works over Bradley to start and nails him with a diving shoulder tackle. Hawk tosses him across the ring with a press slam and Animal tags in to give Casey his $150's worth for being put in this match. Animal with a belly-to-belly suplex and elbow drop as we get an inset promo from the Nasty Boys. That was quick to move the Nasties and LOD into a program together. Hawk with a gutwrench suplex on Casey. Animal tags in and the Doomsday Device ends it at 2:27.
- Julius Caesar (not THE Julius Caesar, obviously) arrives to present Bobby Heenan (a.k.a Heenus Erectus) with a special Caesar's Palace Medallion. Heenan both refers to him as "King" and "Sid Caesar", and tops it off by attempting to steal the chest that the Medallion was presented to him in. He'll probably pawn it for chips, or maybe Virgil can steal it for some f*ck money.
The Berzerker (w/ Mr. Fuji) vs. John Allen:
Somewhere in the two months between the debut and this match, the Berzerker has changed his name from the even less creative "Viking." Not that it matters, he didn't really do much beyond a short-lived go-nowhere angle with the Undertaker a little more than a year later. Berzerker attacks with chops in the corner followed by a fairly decent looking dropkick. Whip to the ropes and he connects with a big boot, then takes a back bump and starts acting goofy. Berzerker with a pair of forward powerslams. He ties Allen up in the ropes, hits him with a running boot to the face, and dumps him to the floor via the first half of an atomic drop for the Count-Out victory at 2:26. Berzerker adds insult to injury by nailing the scrub with a plancha.
- Vince McMahon and Bobby Heenan stop by to enjoy some live entertainment, in the form of Bobby Wade and the Imperials. They perform a cover of Stevie Wonders' "Signed, Sealed, Delivered I'm Yours."
Shane Douglas vs. Paul Roma:
Joined in Progress, and again from the January 21st card from MSG, and this time the commentary from Mooney and Bobby Heenan is left intact. Roma is in control with a bear-hug. Douglas with an ear smack to escape. Roma goes for a dropkick, but Douglas tumbles beneath him to avoid the contact. Douglas with rights and a back elbow. Roma gets introduced to the top turnbuckle and Douglas takes him over with a suplex for a near fall. Whip to the corner is reversed, Douglas with a body press, but Roma rolls through for three at 1:54… or not. The match continues and Douglas sunset fluips Roma for a one count. Whip to the ropes and Roma finishes again with the Powerslam at 2:37. What was the point of keeping this and putting it on national TV? The whole match was an average opener.
- More from Bobby Wade and the Imperials, as they perform Lou Rawls' "You'll Never Find Another Love Like Mine" until Koko B. Ware, who was completely absent from WrestleMania VII, to hijack the stage in a bit of a heel move, only to play it totally face and getting the band into playing along to his "Bird, Bird, Bird" theme music. This segment included Koko getting Bobby Heenan to dance, mostly awkwardly as a way to make Heenan look like a goof, and finally Vince McMahon himself, who does the most energetic and out of control version of the Bird you could ever hope to see.
The Hart Foundation vs. Earthquake & Dino Bravo (w/ Jimmy Hart):
Joined after introductions to avoid showing the Hart Foundation with the Tag Titles, since this was taped from the March 15th card held at Madison Square Garden. Bret Hart and Dino Bravo start. Lockup and Bravo shoves Bret to the corner. Bravo tries it again, but Bret comes back with an elbow and an inverted atomic drop. The Foundation take turns working over the arm. Bravo with boots in the corner, but Neidhart regains control with a hip toss and clothesline. Bret tries a charge to the corner but gets nailed with an atomic drop. Earthquake tags in and quickly misses an elbow drop. Neidhart throws a series of forearms and gets launched into the corner with a shoulder tackle. Double clothesline to Bravo, double clothesline to Earthquake to clear the ring. Bret follows, but Quake catches him off the apron and rams his back into the post. Bravo and Earthquake with a double clothesline. Quake takes Bret from corner to corner and uses his bulk to crush him against the buckle. Bravo with a piledriver for a near fall. Earthquake with a slam and elbow drop for another two count. Powerslam for two. Bravo pounds away across the back and slaps on a bear-hug to put me to sleep. Bret makes the tag, but oh shucks, the referee didn't see it. Bravo and Quake with a double slam to set up for the finish. Quake goes for the Vertical Splash, but Neidhart interrupts it with a clothesline. Double slam on Bravo, and Neidhart slams Bret across his chest for the three count at 10:28. Post-match, Quake boots Neidhart out of the ring and gives Bret the butt splash to make up for his team doing the job. ** Standard formula match. Nothing exciting, nothing awful.
- "Macho Man" Randy Savage and Miss Elizabeth arrive to join McMahon and Heenan while we get some more entertainment. We recap what happened at WrestleMania VII, where the Queen, Sensational Sherri, stabbed Savage in the back for losing, drawing Elizabeth from the crowd to make the unlikely save for the same man who quite callously tossed her aside several years earlier. Savage does 99% of the talking, of course.
Col. Mustafa (w/ Sgt. Slaughter & Gen. Adnan) vs. Billy Burke:
This is the in-ring debut/return of the man formerly known as the Iron Sheik. I guess we could bring up how it makes no sense to put him back on TV after years of getting more and more out of shape and being a relic of the past, but I'm sure most people don't even remember this era of his career… unless you've played WWE 2K16 and both himself and Adnan are featured as playable characters. Who voted yes on that one? Mustafa goes to work, moving in slow motion. He connects with a back suplex and finishes off Burke with the Camel Clutch in just under a minute. Slaughter adds insult to injury by whipping Burke with his riding crop.
- We return to the lounge with Randy Savage and Elizabeth having a slow dance. Aww...
Shawn Michaels (w/ Marty Jannetty) vs. Kato (w/ Mr. Fuji & Tanaka):
We're Joined in Progress from the March 15th card held at Madison Square Garden, with Michaels working on the arm. Whip to the ropes and Michaels with an arm drag before going back to the arm-bar. Kato escapes by sending Michaels to the turnbuckle face-first. Whip to the ropes, Michaels slips between the legs, and after a lengthy criss-cross, connects with another arm drag. They hit the ropes again, but this time Kato grabs Michaels by the hair and slams him face-first to the canvas. Kato with a diving elbow for a near fall, followed by the art known as the Oriental Nerve Lock. Michaels with elbows to the midsection to escape, but he quickly goes down via knee to the chest. Whip to the corner, with Michaels selling it with a chest-first bump to the canvas. Kato with a flying body press, but Michaels rolls through for a two count. Kato sends Michaels into the corner with an atomic drop and lays him out with a clothesline for another two count. Michaels escapes another nerve hold and counters an atomic drop with a victory roll for two. Michaels comes off the ropes and counters a back drop with a forearm across the back of the head. Kato with boots and chops in the corner. Whip across the ring and Kato misses a charge. Michaels ducks under a clothesline, connects with an inverted atomic drop, and turns Kato inside out with a clothesline. Whip to the ropes and Michaels with a diving elbow, followed by the Super-Kick. Michaels to the top rope with an elbow drop for two. Michaels with a roll up, but Kato counters with a handful of tights. Fuji trips up Michaels and draws the attention of the referee, allowing Tanaka to whack Michaels with the cane, and Kato pins him with a back slide at 10:58. *** Really good with the exception of one needlessly long nerve hold. The full length match is only another minute or so.
- My copy of the show is missing a JIP match between Koko B. Ware and Black Bart from the December 28th, 1990 card held at MSG. Holy recycling. It wasn't very good and Koko won with the Ghostbuster.
- We end the night at the Blackjack Table, with Bobby Heenan losing everything he has. Poor Bobby. Where's Dibiase to let him play with his chips, again?
Final Thoughts: It's the first show after WrestleMania, so the maximum recycling to pad out the show was expected (and nowhere near as bad as years prior, like the Mania V follow-up which was just to shill Coliseum Video). Being on location helped make the episode feel like something to watch, and the interaction with various performers at Caesar's Palace lead to a few fun segments. As for the wrestling, a couple of decent matches, but nothing exclusive to the show.
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