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Sunday, April 23rd 2017.
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WWF This Tuesday in Texas
by Michael Powers

And now it's time for WWF/E's first failed attempt at a Tuesday PPV, This Tuesday In Texas, also one of the most original show names ever. It was thirteen years before they forgot that it wouldn't work with Taboo Tuesday.

As a refresher before we get into it, the major story coming in was that The Undertaker had just won his first WWF Title from Hulk Hogan less than a week earlier at Survivor Series. Because Flair got involved, Hogan gets a rematch to settle the controversy. Somehow I don't think that will work. The other major promoted match and angle involves Randy Savage and Jake Roberts. After Roberts tied him to the ropes and got a cobra to bite his arm, Savage has been reinstated (he lost that retirement match to the Ultimate Warrior) to get a match against him on this show.

We start out with an interview from the conclusion of Survivor Series. Mean Gene announces that he is in the BOWELS of the arena, where Paul Bearer and Undertaker are. Bearer cuts a promo about things like embalming fluid and rotting flesh. Taker then shows Gene something in a casket that scares him (we don't see what it is) and promises now that Hulkamania is dead, he will bury it on Tuesday.

Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan are the announcers. It looked like they were going to run down the whole card, but they only talked about the two matches I mentioned earlier and said basically the same thing.

1. Intercontinental Title Match: Bret Hart (c) vs. Skinner
Right from the start, Hart works a lot on Skinner's arm. And for some reason, Skinner was moving around kind of slow early on. Heenan comments that Skinner might mount Hart in his living room. There's got to be a better way to say that. After Hart dominating early on, Skinner rakes him in the eyes and throws him shoulder-first in the ring post take over. He throws him outside, but then just chokes him before bringing him in. After an abdominal stretch, Hart makes a brief comeback but misses an elbow, ending that. Skinner distracts the ref by handing him his spit cup and then gives Hart a shot in the throat with the claw he brings to ringside. After that he just kind of worked on random different parts of the body, which Monsoon chastised him for. He hits a neckbreaker, which is apparently his finisher but I wouldn't know from not having seen too many matches with, but Hart kicks out and makes a comeback. He makes a lot of covers of his own but gets nothing out of it. Skinner rolls up Hart and ends up getting kicked out of the ring. Once their back in the ring, he climbs to the top. Hart throws him off and locks in the sharpshooter for the win. An okay match. (**1/2)

Jake Roberts is backstage with Sean Mooney. He cuts a great promo about how he loved to see the fear in Elizabeth's after he had put Savage out. Then he blames Tunney for setting him off like this, but promises the snake won't be in the ring. Tunney had banned any snakes from the match, which is why that was brought up. Oh, and we should trust Jake. He mentioned that.

Then we get a Mean Gene interview Randy Savage while Elizabeth stands there. He says trust me a lot and then repeats over and over that Roberts liked to see the fear in Elizabeth's eyes. After that he just kind of rambles. Roberts' music starts to play, so he runs off.

2. Jake Roberts vs. Randy Savage
Savage, in full entrance gear, attacks Roberts while he's still walking to the ring. That means we get to see Savage wrestle for a few seconds with a hat on that has an absurdly large feather attached to it. It was a fun visual while it lasted. He brings him into the ring and continues to hit a bunch of punches and then finally hits a double axe-handle off the top rope, at which point Roberts bails. He starts to walk to the back, but Savage brings him back into the ring. As Savage enters, he gets tied up with the ref for a second, so Roberts gives him a shot to the stomach and throws him outside the ring. Once out there he rams his shoulder into the post a few times and throws him back in. From that point on he begins to work over both the shoulder and the arm that is still bandaged up from the snake bite. Savage gets brief comebacks of a move or two but Roberts continually cuts him off. Finally, he goes for the DDT but Savage rams him into corner, causing him to fall down, and then hits the elbow off the top for the pin. After the match, he tries to grab a chair, but it gets taken away, so he grabs the bell instead. He gets it into the ring, but the referee grabs it from his hands. By the time he turns around, Roberts hits a DDT and follows it up with another. Slowly, he leaves, but then turns back around. Under the ring apron he pulls out the bag, all the while saying that it was under the ring, so it doesn't count. Before he can do anything, Elizabeth runs down to the ring and hovers over Savage, trying to ask him to stop. At first Roberts just laughs since it's the same situation all over again. Then he starts yelling at her, asking her if she really loves him and telling her to beg. Savage finally starts to get to his feet, so Roberts gives him a third DDT. Then, as Elizabeth lays on top of Savage again, he does the most dramatic opening of the bag ever. Instead of pulling the snake out, he puts on a big black glove, which means that the snake is presumably dangerous, unlike the ones that made George Welles foam at the mouth (WrestleMania II reference). Just when he is about to pull the snake out, he stops to yell at Elizabeth some more and then picks her up by the hair. The announcers tease that he's going to give her a DDT, but he slaps her. Finally, Tunney and a bunch of refs come out. Roberts leaves, all the while telling Tunney he didn't do anything wrong. I would have complained that the match was too short, but the angle was so great that I really can't. (***)

Backstage, Roberts tells Mean Gene that nobody likes to see a woman have to beg for her man. Then he asks Savage to bring Elizabeth along next time so he can touch her all over again. All the while he was so happy. What an awesome heel he was.

3. Warlord vs. British Bulldog
They tease a test of strength, but Warlord ends up cheap-shotting Bulldog before it happens. Aside from that, it's all Bulldog early on. He sends Warlord out to the floor and hits a crossbody out onto the floor. It looks like Warlord tries to catch, but Bulldog's feet hit the ground, so he just picks him back up and rams him back-first into the post. First we get a brief bearhug from Warlord and a little bit later a really long full nelson. And after all that, he just breaks the hold himself. Bulldog finally makes his comeback with some clotheslines and a big boot. He attempts the running powerslam but Warlord falls on top of him for a nearfall. Bulldog gets Warlord in a crucifix coming off the ropes for the pin. When Bulldog was in control, it was actually pretty good, but Warlord's insanely long full nelson killed all of that. (*1/2)

Sean Mooney is in the interview area with Randy Savage. He grabs and shakes Mooney a few times before saying that what happened was his fault and that this was far from over. The whole time he was switching between pacing around and sitting down on the floor, rocking. Maybe a little too over-the-top.

4. Ted DiBiase and Repo Man vs. Virgil and Tito Santana
Repo and Santana start out with some pretty good action that's dominated by Santana. Once DiBiase gets in, Virgil asks for the tag and he gets it. In a fantastic bump, an atomic drop from Virgil has the power to send DiBiase over the top rope and onto the floor. Back in the ring, they finally get the heat on Virgil, using distractions for double-teaming and choking him with the tag rope. After a swinging neckbreaker, Virgil gets the hot tag, but Santana gets cut off and we get another hot tag in short order. Virgil and DiBiase end up back in the ring. DiBiase holds Virgil so Sherri can hit him with her shoe. Obviously, she hits DiBiase, but the weird thing was that Virgil really didn't duck at all. Repo hitsVirgil with a knee and DiBiase rolls over on him for the pin. A fun match. (***)

Mean Gene is backstage with Hulk Hogan. He ran down what happened at Survivor Series and then cut his usual promo.

5. WWF Title Match: Undertaker (c) vs. Hulk Hogan
Bearer and Taker double-teamed Hogan before the bell, but Hogan quickly takes over and hits a lot of right hands and clotheslines that don't have much effect. Jack Tunney is watching from ringside. A clothesline from Hogan sends Taker out, but he lands on his feet as always. From there Taker takes over with lots of punches and choking. Hogan gets a brief comeback and sends Taker into the corner only to be hit with a boot. We get an early appearance of the walking on the ropes from Taker. They really should have had a name for that, since it obviously wasn't going to be called Old School yet. Hogan drags Taker out to the floor only to be sent into the ringpost and get put in a claw to the FACE once he's back in the ring. There's a weird moment where Hogan sends Taker into the ropes and Taker just trips and falls between the ropes. Taker goes back on the offensive by leaving his feet for a clothesline. He walks the ropes again, only to be pulled down by Hogan. Hogan starts to Hulk-up and hit some extremely light punches as Ric Flair comes down to ringside. Flair immediately starts arguing with Tunney. Distracted, Hogan grabs a chair and hits Flair, who falls on top of Tunney. The best part of this is that Flair got right back to his feet while Tunney was still out. Flair holds the chair for Taker to send Hogan into, but Hogan reverses it. The chair shot only stuns Taker. Bearer is up next to hit Hogan with the urn, but if you said it wouldn't work, you're right. He hits Taker instead, but he still doesn't go down. So Hogan spills the urn over the mat (no green smoke came out, sadly) and threw some ashes in Taker's eyes, blinding him so he can roll up him for the pin. Afterwards, we get the usual Hogan celebration. And, of course, this match resulted in the title being held up for the 1992 Royal Rumble. (*)

Is it worth seeing? I'd say so. There's a few pretty good matches, one fantastic angle, and even the worst matches aren't completely awful. It's on 24/7 right now, so give it a shot.

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