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WWF Mania - February 6, 1993

by Scrooge McSuck

- Our host is Todd Pettengill, who can range from tolerable to really friggin' annoying, depending on the lack of effort/ability put behind his impressions. What was WWF's hard on at the beginning of 1993? Signing radio personalities like Todd Pettengill and Rob Bartlett to get over WRESTLING storylines?

- Last Week on Monday Night Raw, Todd Pettengill promises we'll see Giant Gonzales on WWF Mania... and that's where we are today. Todd introduces us from the Mania studio, and suddenly the Giant Gonzales shows up and yells at Todd to shut up (kind of. It was more marble mouthed than I Want Da Belt!).

- Highlights, courtesy of Coliseum Video, from the 1993 Royal Rumble. The Giant Gonzales makes a surprise debut, attacking the Undertaker, and laying him out like no one else has been able to do. Spliced in between are shots of Gonzales "enjoying" his destruction. "Undertaker... I destroy you! HA HA HA!" Sounds like bad dialogue from an NES game. Todd whips out an Ico-Pro bar, for the sake of product placement.

- The Headshrinkers (w/ Afa) defeat Reno Riggins and Bobby Perez (pulled from Superstars).*

- Brutus Beefcake makes his big return to the WWF, on Monday Night Raw. If you haven't heard, he had a string of bad luck... his mom died of cancer, his father of a heart attack, his wife leaves him, and then, to pile on more shit, had his face crushed in during a parasailing accident, nearly ending his career. This segment was so awesome, Todd recaps it for us, and we only see a brief highlight. I think the live crowd kind of gave up on it towards the end. Beefcake offers an open contract, and who should respond? Money Inc., reigning Tag Team Champions. That's Ted Dibiase and I.R.S., by the way. Looks like Dibiase and Beefcake will go at it on Monday Night Raw. Jimmy Hart advises against it. FORSHADOWING!

Typhoon vs. Doink (the Clown):

Pulled from last weeks episode of WWF Monday Night Raw. It's Doink's in-ring debut... on Raw, and only his second match since making his debut, creating problems and pulling pranks on the WWF Superstars. Doink quickly goes for a single leg trip, then quickly transitions from headlock to armbar. Typhoon shrugs him off, but Doink sweeps the leg again, and grabs a front facelock. "Doink" chant from the kinda-smart crowd at the Manhattan Center. Doink with another takedown, and complete humiliation of the big Typhoon. I don't think Typhoon has used an actual wrestling move yet. Whip to the corner, and to prove me wrong, he grabs a bearhug. Doink rakes the eyes to escape, brings him down with a front facelock, and bitch slaps him a few times. Typhoon gets pissy, and catches Doink off the ropes with a powerslam. Whip to the corner, the charge misses, and Doink with a clothesline from the middle rope for the three count, with a handful of tights, at around the 2:30 mark. Complete squash of Typhoon, courtesy of the Clown. He is groomed for a program with Crush, so it makes sense to a feed a big man or two to build Doink up.

- Courtesy of the Miami Project Foundation, last sunday, Tatanka and Shawn Michaels put their problems aside to sign autographs without the need to strip down to their tights and wrestle.

- Steve Jordan of the Minnesota Vikings introduces the Perfect Passer, Mr. Perfect. Through the magic of film editing, Mr. Perfect throws a successful pass to himself. The Perfect vignettes were always awesome, but the WWF really needed to play him up as a tweener rather than a straight babyface in 1993.

- Razor Ramon defeated Pete Christie, pulled from Superstars. Ramon was kind of involved with Mr. Perfect, but in a great example of "too much going on", Perfect was already married into a program with the recently debuted Narcissist, Lex Luger, so the issue with Ramon kind of went away, and Ramon did a slow burn face turn through the Spring and leading into the Summer.

- Todd Pettengill eyes the Giant Gonzales eating.... about as entertaining as you would think. So, in the span of TWO WEEKS, we've already reduced the Giant Gonzales into a comedy bit. I know people were scuffing and laughing at him to begin with, but this really doesn't help much.

- "El Matador" Tito Santana defeated Some Masked Scrub. Pulled from WWF Wrestling Challenge. Monsoon and Heenan talk about the WWF's Headlock on Hunger, from Madison Square Garden, last friday night.

- Last week on WWF Superstars, Ray Rougeau caught up with mr. americana himself, "Hacsksaw" Jim Duggan. He's offering a challenge to the mighty Yokozuna, and will, in fact, meet him in the ring "next week" on Superstars to prove the superior powers of the United States over... whatever country Yokozuna was being introduced from at this given week. Duggan, the classy man he is, calls the foreigner a communist. Ugh... did someone watch an episode of All In The Family before scripting this segment?

- WrestleMania IX is coming to Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas, NV. Lots of footage of Bret Hart, as well as other top WWF names like Shawn Michaels, Mr. Perfect, Razor Ramon, Crush, Randy Savage and... Damien Demento? Interesting choice.

- "The Narcissist" Lex Luger makes his in-ring debut, on the last episode of WWF Monday Night Raw. Entrance complete with a lengthy full mirror posedown, and yes, this is actually longer than the match itself. One of the ring-card girls (one of the hefty ones) walks behind him to distract his view of himself... you see, he's a heel, and he's in love with himself. Har Har Har, oh the world of the obvious. Luger KO's the scrub with a forearm, but we're a few weeks from establishing the loaded forearm gimmick.

- Courtesy of Madison Square Garden, Bret Hart delivers a check for $100,000 to the Headlock on Hunger. The date on the screen seems wrong, suggesting this was on January 26th, but that was a tuesday, and they clearly said friday night, which was January 29th. Sorry, I'm nit-picking things, again. Bret gives a speech on behalf of the WWF about making the world a better place and all that good stuff.

- Flashback to the July 16th, 1990 episode of WWF Prime Time Wrestling. Hillbilly Jim is in action, taking on Pistol Pez Whatley. Whip to the corner, and Hillbilly mounts him with a series of rights and lefts. Whip to the opposite corner, Pez runs into a big boot, and Hillbilly takes him down for the three count. Dubbed in hillbilly music follows. He'll be on WWF Mania next week, no doubt as Todd's counter-part, much like Giant Gonzales had been this week.

Final Thoughts: Not too bad of a show for recapping a few of the more important angles at the time, but wow, was this show all over the place. There were squash matches, fine, there were interview recaps, OK, but then we got a random clip from All-American Wrestling, random "behind he scenes footage" of an autograph session, and last and certainly the most odd... recycling a squash match, from three years ago, featuring Hillbilly Jim? Yes, this seems more odd than the non-comedy stylings of Todd and the Giant Gonzales. What a totally whacked out and weird show.

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