WWE Main Event - March 6, 2013
by Scrooge McSuck
- We open the show with an "In Memory of" for William Moody, a.k.a Paul Bearer, a.k.a Percy Pringle III. Hopefully they'll do a video proper for him on Smackdown or Raw, considering how much he was loved by others in the business, and for quite a lengthy tenure with the company over the past two decades.
- Originally taped on March 5th, 2013, from Albany, NY. We're 32 days away from WrestleMania XXIX! Michael Cole and the Miz (ugh) are on hand to call the action, unless otherwise noted.
Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett (Intercontinental Champion):
Creative sign of the Night: WWE
<3 Randy Orton. I'm guessing Barrett gets to do another clean job in his quest to never win a match as Intercontinental Champion... that reminds me, did Bo Dallas flop so hard they immediately called that off? Barrett hams up his role in Dead Man Down to get some cheap heat before the match starts. Orton finally interrupts with a short right hand, then throws Barrett in the ring to start the match, proper. He unloads on Barrett in the corner with rights, then catches him off the ropes with an elbow. He follows with the GARVIN STOMP and drops a knee across the back of the head for a two count. Barrett comes back with a headbutt and jabs, and Orton responds with his own rights and sends Barrett to the floor with a clothesline as we take out first commercial break.
We come back with Orton sending Barrett to the corner, then charging in, only to meet the bottoms of his boots. Barrett with a neck breaker for a two count. He comes off the ropes with a knee across the chest and slaps on a chinlock. Orton quickly counters, taking Barrett down with a back suplex. He connects with his signature dropkick for a two count. Orton with mounted punches in the corner, followed by a suplex for a two count. Barrett rolls to the floor, suckering Orton out and sending him into the steps for making the mistake. Back inside, Orton teases the DDT, but Barrett back drops him onto the apron, and connects with a crescent kick to the midsection, knocking Orton back to the floor as we take another break.
We're back, with Barrett ramming a knee into the midsection, then mounting Orton with a flurry of rights. He drives a series of knees to the body and comes off with a running boot, knocking Orton through the ropes. He pulls Orton back in and covers for two. Orton rolls back to the floor, and this time Barrett makes the mistake of following, but manages to turn the tables on Orton, reversing a whip into the steps, sending the Viper into them, instead. Back inside, Barrett heads to the top rope, but takes too long and gets hammered on with rights. Orton follows him up, and takes him down with a super-plex. He takes too long to cover, only getting a two count. They slug it out for a while, with Barrett eventually gaining the upperhand. Whip to the corner, Orton explodes out with a clothesline. Barrett avoids the powerslam, but Orton catches him with his back breaker. He connects with the DDT and sets up for the RKO, but Barrett rolls to the floor. Barrett hangs him up across the top rope, and comes back in with a running boot for two. He goes for the Bull Hammer, but Orton counters with a powerslam, and this time the RKO does connect, and that's good enough for the three count at 16:48. That was a predictable finish... ignoring the constant jobbing of the second tier Champions, a solid match to open Main Event, a trend that almost always comes through with satisfactory results.
Zack Ryder vs. Cody Rhodes:
Wow, one of these two will actually pick up a victory, barring a No Contest finish due to interference. This would be like the equivilant of Glass Joe fighting Von Kaiser... and I'm not making that reference because of Ryder's appearance resembling that of a wussy frenchman and Cody's pornstache. Ryder doesn't even get the "already in the ring" entrance, so you know he's doomed. He grabs a waistlock to start. Criss-cross, Ryder with an arm drag and hooks an armbar. Whip to the corner, Rhodes meets an elbow, and Ryder takes him down with a One-Man Flap Jack for two. Rhodes tries taking a walk, but Ryder throws him back in the ring, only to take a knee to the face for a two count. According to Michael Cole, the Rhodes Scholars reunite again to face the New Age Outlaws on next week's episode of Monday Night Raw. Rhodes with a front suplex for a two count, then grabs a front facelock. Ryder escapes, slamming Rhodes face first into the canvas. He comes off the top with a missile dropkick and runs into the corner with a diving forearm. Broski Boot misses, Rhodes hits the Disaster Kick and finishes Ryder off with the Cross Rhodes at 3:04. Action packed match for the whole three minutes it recieved.
- Last Monday on Raw, Triple H called out Brock Lesnar for ReMatch #1 that smart fans don't really want to see, but will still pay to see it anyway, making all the complaining pointless.
Sin Cara vs. Antonio Cesaro (US Champion):
Okay, if Cesaro does the job here, I quit recapping the current WWE product. Sin Cara gets to flounder around aimlessly, again, with Rey's excessive leaves for injuries, drug violations, or whatever excuses you can come up for why he misses television for weeks, sometimes months at a time, only to show up at what seems like random for a month, only to follow that with more missed time. They fight over a waistlock, with Cesaro coming out on top of that exchange. Cesaro throws Sin Cara down, and Sin Cara responds by sending Cesaro to the floor with an arm drag. He follows Cesaro to the floor, taking him down with a hurricanrana. Cesaro blocks a sunset flip and spins Sin Cara around like a toy. He throws Sin Cara to the corner and stomps him down. Sin Cara dead lifts Sin Cara off the canvas and slams him down for a two count. He slaps on a sleeper hold, but willingly lets go. Whip to the ropes and Sin Cara surprises him with a small package for two. Sin Cara with the Canadian Destroyer (or whatever the fuck Petey Williams move was called) for two! Criss-cross and Sin Cara sends Cesaro to the floor with a wicked sick head scissors. Suicide dive meets a European Uppercut, coincidentally from a European. Cesaro to the top rope, only to take an enziguri to the face. Sin Cara runs up and goes for another hurricanrana. Cesaro blocks for the moment, but Sin Cara finishes it off in spectacular fashion and covers... FOR THREE at 4:16. Rematch! Rematch! Rematch! Wow, that was a fantastic match for four minutes. I demand a 15-minute rematch next week on Main Event. Sin Cara celebrates, but Cesaro reminds everyone he's still the Champion.
- The Undertaker "returned" on Monday Night Raw, CM Punk is challenging him for the 20-0 undefeated streak at WrestleMania. Let's ignore how we got to that road and just pretend it was done without lame, unnecessary means.
- John Cena and the Rock did a face-to-face that wasn't all that bad, and that's it for Main Event. I like doing recaps to end the show, instead of filling the middle portion. Makes it feel even more old school like a weekly SNME.
Final Thoughts: This might've been the best show in Main Event history, taking into account match quality for all three matches featured. Orton vs. Barrett was nothing special for the "big match" of the week, but was still a strong showing for both men. We followed that with a short, yet energetic match between Rhodes and Ryder, two men who haven't exactly been in a favorable spot, booking wise, lately. We then followed that with an outstanding match between Sin Cara and Antonio Cesaro, one I had zero anticipation to deliver anything but time filler. I was wrong, and demand more. Maybe next week they'll follow it up, but you never know.
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